The Earl’s Last Dance Read online

  “You have not smiled like this in years,” said Frederica.

  “There has been little to smile about. I wanted to tell you first because you are the one who has always made yourself available to help me through the trials I have experienced.”

  “That is what friends do, as best they can.”

  “No, it really isn’t. There were times that I felt utterly abandoned after the scandal at the ball.”

  “I have never cared for gossip. It is a waste of good tea to entertain it.”

  “But most people do,” said Jane. “After all the cuts I have endured since then, all the whispers as I walk by, and the disapproving stares, I have finally met someone who does not care about the past. A gentleman who will still have me.”

  “Does your father approve of this man?”

  “They get along well.”

  Frederica was so excited for her friend that she wanted to jump up and down with it. “You did not even tell me there were any acceptable gentlemen on the horizon.”

  “My horizon has been murky for so long that I kept it from everyone. In truth, I have been waiting for things to fall apart. But they have progressed well.”

  “This sounds serious then.”

  “I believe he will propose very soon, and am certain my father will grant us his blessing. My suitor is quite the accomplished gentleman. The possibilities in life are now without limit.”

  Frederica scrunched her eyebrows together. “Is that the end of your surprising news?”

  Jane hesitated. “What more could there be?”

  “Nothing. It was wonderful news. It’s just that there is a man headed straight for us. I thought there might be an introduction on the way.”

  Jane glanced over and noticed an attractive man, but absolutely not the right one. Her face dropped the moment her eyes locked with his. Lord Brisby took long strides heading over to them, looking quite in fashion in his tailcoat and starched cravat.

  “I thought it might be you I saw from across the park.” He smiled as if greeting a close friend.

  “I frequently take in some fresh air at this time of the evening.”

  “Of course. How is everyone supposed to know who is important these days if they do not show their faces in the sun?”

  “Anyone is capable of going on a stroll,” said Jane. “I feel no more important than the next person.”

  “Strolling isn’t cheap.”

  “The air is free, sir.”

  “It is paid for in time. Does the average blacksmith have a few hours to meander through Hyde Park? Or are they too busy trying to feed themselves? One way or another, this is reserved for the privileged few.”

  “Is that what we are?”

  Frederica smiled. “To be fair, I can not remember the last time I smelted a thing.”

  He tipped his hat. “I am happy to have one person on my side.”

  “How rude of me,” said Jane. “Mrs. Wood, may I present Lord Brisby.”

  He turned to walk with them. “I have never even seen a forge.”

  Jane sighed. “I am outnumbered at this point. But I only feel as important as I have a right to be. Everyone is equal in God’s eyes.”

  “Not everyone is able to secure such a fine gentleman to marry.” Frederica blurted it out.

  Jane wondered why it made her so unhappy that she did. Was it the way Lord Brisby flinched at the news? Or was it that she wasn’t ready for him to know yet?

  “Marriage?” He said it absently. “Imagine that. The last time we met, it was only your first season. Now you are considering big decisions about the rest of your life.”

  “We met a long time ago,” said Jane. “And I am not considering it. Only the formalities remain.”

  “I see. Were you going to tell me?”

  “I just did.”

  “No, Mrs. Wood did. You and I were in the middle of a different conversation. I would think a lady might offer such a piece of information first. It being news of tremendous importance.”

  “It is not as if we are friends. I have not seen you in years.”

  “Or perhaps you did not want me to know,” said Brisby.

  “What reason could I have for not wanting you to know?”

  “We never finished the dance.”

  “It went quite far enough.”

  “If that is your opinion, I can only guess at other possibilities. Is it because you are not as sure of your current relationship as you would like to be? Do you wonder whether it is the right decision to pursue it to the final stage?”

  “It is the perfect decision,” said Jane. “My father gets along with him well.”

  “Perhaps they should get married.”

  “Do not be a saucebox. I trust my father’s judgment completely.”

  “And what of your own?”

  “He has no reason to steer me in the wrong direction.”

  “But that was not the question. It isn’t always a matter of malicious intent, but failing to recognize what his daughter truly needs to make her happy.”

  Jane’s neck felt stiff. Her eyes narrowed. “And I suppose you are the man to know what might make me happy?”

  “I would never presume to know you so intimately. But I understand women well enough.”

  “I have no doubt about that. Tales of your conquests are freely told these days.”

  “And what have the fine ladies of the beau monde come up with over their prattle broth now?”

  “Faith, this is the first time I have seen you uncomfortable. I did not realize it was possible.”

  “Do not be too pleased with yourself,” said Brisby. “I am not quite scandal proof yet, although I am doing my best to reach such an enviable position.”

  “Having no shame is not something to aspire to.”

  “Sometimes the world dictates our goals for us, Miss Jane. Now weren’t we discussing your situation?”

  “Are you uncomfortable analyzing your own?”

  “Hardly. It is just a waste of the short time we have here. My path has been set for me while you are taking a new turn in life.”

  “An agreeable turn.”

  “Perhaps,” said Brisby. “But there must be passion in your relationship, or you will never be content.”

  “That is sure to come soon after I am married.”

  “How can you be certain? Is there a glimmer of it between you now?”

  “That is not your business.”

  “I am trying to help.”

  “It is not a feeling that is meant to overtake me now,” said Jane.

  “It did once before, in a very dark room, and you drank it down like wine.”

  “Then I spent years attempting to outrun the gossip that resulted from one unguarded moment. All there needs to be now is respect and mutual admiration. I am content with that.”

  Lord Brisby laughed. “Do you think that will keep you warm at night?”

  “A good fire does wonders. Admiration is required for a happy marriage.”

  “Really? Not sentiments like love or a deep yearning for each other?”

  “That will develop over the years.”

  “All of it? You expect a lot out of matrimony. Time only makes good things better or bad things worse. Every trait I have mentioned either exists, or it does not.”

  “This entire conversation has me scandalized just listening to it,” said Frederica.

  Brisby shrugged. “We can not mince words at this late hour.”

  ”What was it you once told me?” Jane looked up, rubbing a finger over her chin. “Something about a modicum of tact.”

  “The circumstances are dire.”

  “And you are an extremely forward man to judge my life.”

  “I am not judging. Only giving you the benefit of my knowledge as it concerns the hearts of women.”

  “I have some knowledge as well, you know? About the hearts of men.”

  “What do you think you know about men?”

  “That they can be cold. And men
like you are the worst there are. The most depraved individuals who care for nothing other than ruining a woman’s reputation for the sport.”

  Brisby suddenly stopped walking. “Is that so?”

  “I know enough of you to have realized the truth a long time ago.”

  “Truth depends on who is looking. There are many shades to life, to the people who cross our paths in it.”

  “There is only one version for someone such as yourself, a person committed to his own uncaring pleasure.”

  “Those are powerful words. Is there a way to change your mind?”

  “Why would you want to?” said Jane. “Why care what I think?”

  “To avoid even more slander heaped upon my name. I have had enough over the last few years.”

  “Once I have formed an opinion, it is impossible to alter it.”

  “Are you so sure?” Brisby flashed a mischievous smile. “What if I were to pick you flowers right now?”

  “Don’t you dare!”

  “But they are beautiful when in season. And that would hardly be uncaring. It is a gift I wish to give. Something to leave you with fonder memories of our time together.”

  “We have had no time together.”

  “You are here and so am I. Whatever else you think about it, that is certainly the truth.” He glanced over the flowers that grew along the side of the path. “What is your favorite color?”

  “Do not even consider causing a scene in public. My suitor will have his back up about that.”

  “This gentleman and his delicate feelings are no concern of mine. All I want is to give you something that may warm your heart. Those purple flowers over there seem like a lovely choice for that.”

  “I am content with a cold heart.” Jane winced the moment the words escaped her.

  Brisby burst into laughter. “My theories have been proven!”

  “Oh, cheese it. I do not want any flowers, and will never speak to you again if you go through with this.”

  “Very well. I am only upsetting you now, and have no wish to. I will leave you to your life, Miss Jane.”

  “And I will leave you to yours.”

  Lord Brisby stood alone in the middle of the path as two ladies walked away from him.

  Frederica spoke softly to her friend. “I have heard many stories about the man, but he seemed rather nice. All he wanted in the end was to give you something pretty.”

  “Something that would have ruined my hope for an engagement. For the second time, at that!”

  “You have not promised anything yet. Your conscience would be clear if you were to make another choice.”

  “I do not want another choice. There is nothing wrong with the man I am seeing. More options would not be better.”

  “Options are always better.”

  “How can you defend him? Lord Brisby would destroy something before it even has a chance to thrive.”

  “I am not defending him,” said Frederica. “Only thinking about what your life may become.”

  “I would prefer to go through it without any more scandals. Imagine being seen accepting flowers from another man in public.”

  “Yes, imagine it. And accepting them from a man who can make you so peppery in only a short conversation.”

  “That is not a good thing.”

  “That is extremely strong emotion.”

  Jane’s eyes narrowed. Frederica smiled as they strolled on.

  Chapter 3

  Autumn 1821

  The dinner party was an incredible success with a throng of people in attendance. Jane meandered through the huge rooms of the country estate, speaking to one person after another. She was pleased to be there, even without an escort. Jane had gotten used to being on her own by then. The place was filled with old friends and acquaintances who she enjoyed seeing very much. It was great fun to be updated on the changes that occurred in people’s lives over the years. That was amazing, how everything progressed in random directions despite best-laid plans.

  Musicians played soothing music. She wandered out onto a terrace that overlooked the vast garden of the estate. It was dark outside, even with lantern light along the rail. Shadows danced by flickering candles. The night could be so lovely in the country where nothing blocked the view of a sky filled with stars.

  Jane leaned forward on the terrace rail and looked over the manicured lawn that stretched out so far that she wouldn’t be able to see where it ended even if it had been brighter. Trees and bushes were whimsical shapes in the dark, cones and spheres without color.

  “Are you enjoying the view? Or perhaps the lack of one? I find it relaxing sometimes to look out into nothing. It can be quite serene.”

  It was his voice again, from somewhere behind her. Jane smiled. Even after all the waylaid plans that knowing him had caused, she couldn’t help herself.

  “You have found me,” she said. “It seems that wherever I go in this world, you turn up to find me, eventually.”

  “Perhaps we are destined to be together.” Lord Brisby leaned on the railing beside her. “Forgive me.”

  “For what?”

  “I misspoke. It has been such a long time that I must have forgotten what your circumstances were when last we met. You were looking forward to being married and have, no doubt, done so by now. Do you have children? Is your entire family here?”

  Jane looked down into the darkness. A sudden melancholy came over her at the mention of children. “My circumstances differ greatly from what you imagine. I never married.”

  “I hope it was nothing I did.”

  “How could it have been? You never pursued me beyond our meeting in Hyde Park. You picked no flowers even though you seemed to delight in torturing me with the idea of it. Nothing you did could have affected my relationship.”

  “What destroyed it then?”

  She sighed. “A disturbing lack of passion.”

  “So it was my fault after all, for putting that thought into your head.”

  “I can not decide if you somehow knew me well or just have a deep grasp of relationships, but the comments you made were correct. It is undeniable. I got engaged to my suitor at the time, and my family allowed us more freedom to be together. It let me see the things about him that would never change. The tendencies I would have to endure for the rest of my life. Some were depressing. There was no spark between us I could cling to. Nothing about him that made my heart beat faster.”

  “How did this travesty end?”

  “As most things do… Badly.”

  “Then what has begun since? We are alone on a terrace at night. Will a new suitor take issue with it? Will your aunt come running out here to push me off the side?”

  Jane chuckled at that. “There are no more suitors to speak of. My family has given up on me. My aunt believes I am a waste of time to even chaperone.”

  He shook his head. “That is dreadful. A person should never be considered a waste of time.”

  “All the same, it happens one day. An indiscretion in a cloakroom, a failed engagement, and then you get older. Before you know it, you are officially on the shelf. People give up on other people every day.”

  “Your own family should not leave you to the wolves.”

  “Is that what is taking place right now, Lord Brisby? Has the wolf descended upon me?”

  “Call it what you will. I am used to your taunts. But through it all, I have not given up on you yet.”

  “But you easily could. Everyone else has. It makes no difference anymore. The trick to getting along with people is accepting that they will let you down.”

  “The years have left you bitter.”

  “They have only made me wiser,” said Jane. “Perhaps it is the same thing.”

  “It doesn’t have to be. I have never abandoned anyone who is important to me.”

  “The conversation always comes back to us. Why would I be so important to you? We run into each other every few years, and I reject your advances.”

  Brisb
y gave her a rakish grin. “That is not how it happened the first time we met.”

  “That first time was long ago. I do not see why you even continue with such an unwavering pursuit.”

  He stared out past the lantern light, losing himself in the shadows beyond. “Sometimes, neither do I.”

  “Then I will leave you to your deliberation.”

  Jane turned and walked away again. It seemed as if all she ever did was leave him standing there alone. It was the same sense of loss for Brisby every time, the one that gripped him on that dance floor years ago. He took a step as if to follow her, but stopped himself. It would never do for the notorious rake to chase after a woman. It was embarrassing enough for him to fail at winning her whenever they met. Jane never looked back as she left the terrace. The years really had taught her a lot. That was exactly the right way to walk out of someone’s life.

  Chapter 4

  Winter 1824

  A cold wind blew through the streets of London. Christmastide would be upon them soon. Jane sauntered around inside the Bond Street Bazaar just to get away from the weather. The sky looked dark and foreboding beyond the skylights high above. A storm would come at any moment. It was a lonely time of year for her. People rushed in all directions, looking at everything there was on display in the stalls of that vast space. Jane hardly noticed that she walked more slowly than the rest of them while staring at the ground. A man bumped into her as he turned away from a stall, and they bounced off each other, stopping in their tracks.

  “I am terribly sorry,” he said. “I was not looking where I was going. Are you all...” He paused while staring at her and a smile came to his face. “Miss Jane? Is that you underneath such a large bonnet?”

  “Of course it is, Lord Brisby. And I will have you know my bonnet is the perfect size for my head.”

  “I thought it might obstruct your vision with a brim so wide.”

  “You already admitted that you were at fault.”

  “That was before I realized who I was addressing.”

  “What does that have to do with anything?”

  “Between us, it makes all the difference in the world.”

  “I rather think you did that on purpose,” said Jane.